Techniques
Imagining Zack’s hands on my waist, guiding me. Behind my lids I see him, looking up at me, gritting his teeth with pleasure. I press harder, knees miming the wings of a snow angel into the sheets, thinking of his moans when I would lick him clean.I implore my brain to remember his voice, the fondness in it whenever he was aroused. Every exchange between us -- public or private, kinky or not -- was always laced with love. I felt it the first time I shook his large hand. The same hands that. All these emotions are swelling within me as I glare at Jay. ‘So make Louisa throw them out.’ ‘What makes you think Louisa is still here?’ ‘What do you think I am, stupid? If she was here when I went to bed last night after midnight, she is still here now. And she was, and she is. You have one hour to clear out this mess, got it, Jay, or . . .’ ‘Come on, Holly. We need to go. Jay will make sure these people are gone, right, man?’ ‘Sure thing, Ty. Bye, Holly.’ I haul my fatigued body through. ”“I just think it’s weird to tell someone else about stuff like that.”“Father Nicholas knows my struggles and my weaknesses. But think about this — what are your options if you believe having sex is a sin? What would your church say about it?”“That it’s a sign of being reprobate and predestined to hell.”“So, you’re irredeemable, is that it? Once we had sex, it was all over for you? You’re on a ‘Highway to Hell’ and there are no exit ramps? If so, why would you even THINK about having sex with. Carrie had a tendency to worry a lot, and Mel and I often joked about it. In all reality though, it probably wouldn't be the best idea in the world to have a young, attractive, intoxicated woman walking home in the middle of the night. And since Melanie and I lived in the same neighbourhood, it just made sense for us to walk together. "Don't be long," Carrie said as we stepped out the door. "I'll try tostay up and wait for you." "Nah, don't worry about it," I returned. "Just get some sleep. .
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