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I discovered to my increasing delight that there was another Sarah, a harder-edged, implacable young woman who could scare me, who could take me to a very different place. A cruel mistress, hard to appease, stern in her punishments, but ultimately the same Sarah as I loved for her gentleness and sensuality too, and soon loved all the more for the way she could tap into my newly discovered darker desires with total enthusiasm and complicity.We were a very rare pairing. In the 1980s S&M dykes. "I replied, in a more stern voice, "no, asshole, you couldn't have, now just drop it before I drop you right here and now."He heard the seriousness of my tone and saw the anger in my eyes, and wisely decided to walk away while he still could. However, he had succeeded in getting me so upset that I ordered a couple of shots of Jack Daniel's, with a beer chaser, to calm my nerves. I downed them quickly, and felt the effects just as quickly.I was a bit tipsy and probably shouldn't have thought. I was wearing this woman's clothes. I was wearing this woman'sunderwear, in front of her! I couldn't move."Come here."I did as she said. As I slowly walked towards her, I looked down at theground, wishing it would swallow me up. I stopped a few feet in font ofher."That's my favourite blouse you know." She said.I said nothing, just kept staring downwards, my head bowed in quietacceptance."I love the feel of the material on my skin; the delicate lace detailand the way it makes me feel all. “It was clear to me that the woman did not know what he was talking about.”“Dad, Mom, I’ve been thinking about things. The man is not really my dad, not in any real sense. You are Daddy. He’s okay, he’s my father I guess; but not my daddy. I can be around him; I’m good with that. I know he sacrificed for you momma, and for that he gets some attention. It’ll be okay; I’ll be good.“But Dad, Mom, I am not going to be pretending to be his daughter. I mean the man has got himself an ex-convict.
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