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“What are you doing?” I asked.“Do I look sexy?”“I already told you, you look sexy,” I said.“Are you hard?”I wasn’t. She’d just wakened me. My brain still wanted to be asleep. I looked down.“Can’t you tell?” I asked, looking at the front of my briefs.“Why aren’t you hard?” she complained.“Give me a second,” I said. “I don’t spring to full hard-on every time you walk into the room.”“Don’t be mean to me,” she said.“Look,” I said. “It’s late. Just tell me what you want.”“I want you to be hard,” she. If you’d have told me that I’d be contemplating this choice back in 2014, before we ever laid eyes on Francis, or even before October 2017 when their affair burst into life again, I’d have said you were a crazy man.But as I sat there feeling sorry for myself, feeling a little like Houdini trying to wriggle out of chains and a straitjacket, I realized that bit by bit I’d allowed our marriage to get to this point. Sure, I wasn’t the only one responsible. Sue, Francis and even Jenny had all had. I had my crate put in storage and looked for a job, told dad I was still in the states, changed my name to Alford and forged some references and worked in Liverpool until I fancied some country air and her ladyship took me on as Butler.She knew my references were forged, she thought she could sack me any time and that would keep me in line and stop me telling her husband about her lovers.But now I had half a million dollars to spend, without being noticed.We found a nice little apartment, it. Sometimes there's an advantage to being average."Was writing "Average Joes" easier than your first book?" Actually, it was a lot harder, for a variety of reasons. I never intended to write again, I thought I said all I had to say with the first book. 'Average Joes' was my wifes' idea."Maria went home with my ring on her finger. I was a little apprehensive about the kids' reaction, but they were, to quote Mickey, 'cool with it'.Cassie and Tina called and asked if it was too soon to start calling.
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